If you Want Outer Success, do the Inner Work: Five Practices for your Inner Workout

A participant in a recent webinar said that he was not going ‘within’ enough, so his output was not great. That statement struck a chord. Outer work without inner work renders us automaton-like. The outer us is a reflection of the inner us. To shine on the outside, it helps to shine on the inside.

Yes, there is a target, a goal and yes, it’s possible to move towards that target with focus and determination and achieve it.  The mindset might be: ‘’That’s the goal, I’m going to achieve it.’’

And that works in the short term, even medium term, but our inner striving for meaning will typically slow us down in the long term.

Without the inner work it’s difficult to sustain long-term drive. Here are five practices for your inner workout – and they come with the added benefit of not causing you to breakout into a sweat.

1. Reflection

‘’Without reflection, we go blindly on our way, creating more unintended consequences, and failing to achieve anything useful.’’ Margaret Wheatley.

Have you ever taken the time to evaluate how you were, what you achieved, what went well, what didn’t go so well at the close of the day? And after that, think about what you might do differently in future?

Often, if something goes wrong, we scold ourselves or blame others or make an excuse. The learning comes from reflecting on how the situation arose, what happened that derailed us and how we can clear any remaining debris – and avoid, or more effectively handle the situation in the future. Even if something didn’t go badly wrong, we can still benefit by asking what went well, or what can be better?

Leaders can query diverse aspects of their role. Are they helping others perform in line with potential? How well are they picking up on signals from their team? What are they doing too much of and what are they doing too little of?

If this sounds like a good idea but you aren’t sure you can do this, here are a few suggestions:

Tiny steps: Allocate 5 minutes of commute time to reflecting on the day. Practice reflection at the end of the day, anticipation at the start of the day.

Research shows that commuters who spent their commute planning their day were happier, more productive and experienced less burn out than those who didn’t.

Research (https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=2414478&download=yes) also shows that call centre workers who spent 15 minutes at the end of the day reflecting on their learnings were 23% more productive – after just 10 days - than workers who did no reflection.

Pick a time: What gets scheduled is more likely to get done. I was working with a leader who hated his commute. Instead of commute time being vent time, he decided to transfer his energy to planning his day and reflecting on his day – and in very bad traffic, he practiced gratitude.

Manage expectations: Enjoy giving yourself your reflection time and resist the temptation to experience huge gains immediately. Notice how your emotions are changing over time – are you calmer, more positive? And check on your productivity? Are other people noticing a change? Don’t give up before the exponential growth curve kicks in.

Match the medium: Choose the form of reflection that suits you best. It might be thinking, writing, or talking to a trusted friend (so long as you focus on reflection and not a critical assessment of the latest movie releases)

The goal of reflection is to learn and grow. As Peter Drucker advised:

“Follow effective action with quiet reflection. From the quiet reflection, will come even more effective action.”

2. Core Alignment

Who are you at your core? What values drive you, what vision do you have for your life and what purpose motivates you to get out of bed every day?

In his book, ‘The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People,’ Stephen Covey provides a practical path to determining your values, vision and purpose. You can also work with a coach or enroll in a retreat.

Enjoy the process and accept that it may well be a work in process to define your vision, values and purpose to your complete satisfaction.

One of my values is to be true to yourself. I find it incredibly uplifting when I enter an organization, having already researched their values, to experience the values in action.  The opposite is also true.

Once you have a sense of your core values, vision and purpose, it is important to listen to yourself and check when these are in and out of alignment. Be aware of your reactions to people or in situations and question whether a core value is being upheld or under attack.

Core alignment helps us find meaning. We find meaning when there is a connection between who we are with and what we are doing and with our vision, values and purpose. It is unlikely that all our values will be in alignment with our colleagues or organization, but we need to be able to relate elements of our core values, vision, purpose, to a bigger picture to find meaning and motivation.

3. Presence

Being present in the moment is a difficult ask for many of us. We tend to direct our thoughts to the past or the future, but rarely in the actual moment. Yet the only moment we can influence is the present one.

Yes, we have concerns about the future and concerns about the past, but we can be consciously in the present moment and still reflect on the past and plan for the future. It is the ‘worry maze’ that doesn’t serve us too well – when we choose to ruminate without analysis or devoid of perspective.

In the present moment, you can ask yourself questions: How do I want to use this moment? What am I thinking (and how is that serving me)? Am I aware of any feeling (what is it trying to tell me)?

In the present moment, you can choose to consciously direct your attention – as opposed to being distracted by fleeting thoughts or responding to quick-fire requests and impulses.

4. Micro-Meditations

The benefits of regular meditation are well-known. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/feeling-it/201309/20-scientific-reasons-start-meditating-today. It boosts your happiness, creativity, productivity, health and self-control.

I say micro-meditations, because people usually say, ‘’I’m too busy for meditation.’’ This is typically after they’ve read the newspaper for 20 minutes and checked their WhatsApp for half an hour.

Start with 5 minutes and just sit and be. Don’t pressure yourself into thinking you have to be devoid of thoughts, just be conscious of them and let them go (whenever you’re ready).

An energy booster is to micro-meditate during the day. Sit still and be still. If that feels awkward, get a cup of tea and hold it as you stare out to the middle distance and just breathe.

There are many resources to support your meditation practice, such as Insight Timer, Headspace, Mindful.org and Brain.FM.

5. Appreciation

When we assess our lot in life, we have a tendency to compare ourselves with those we believe have more. We tend not to compare ourselves to the many people who have less than us. This is not a helpful practice. If we don’t appreciate what we have, why would we be able to appreciate having more? Instead, focus on what we have and what we are. There are many ways to do this.

Gratitude

Every morning and every evening, list 10 things you are grateful for. You can vary the items on the list and have fun as you create it. ‘’I’m grateful for the opportunity to lead this project. I’m grateful I remembered to file my tax return last month. I’m grateful that today it’s Tuesday and my colleague always brings aloo parantha to share for breakfast on Tuesdays.’’

Acceptance

One of my favourite sayings is, ‘’What you resist persists.’’ There is little point in fighting reality. Of course, you can take action to change something you believe is wrong. It just doesn’t help to focus on why something shouldn’t be the way it is. Appreciate that you can accept what you are facing - and that you can then take action, if required and as appropriate.

Strengths

Reflect on the ways people have appreciated you in the past and what people value in you. List the traits or skills and recount these to yourself on a regular basis. Appreciate yourself!

Following these five steps will provide you with insight into who you are at heart and where you envisage yourself being, support you in understanding how to improve, enable a blossoming of creative productivity - and a diminishing of stress, and lay a solid foundation of awareness and appreciation. We still need to put in the effort to improve our effectiveness and strengthen our relationships. Perhaps we can consider these five steps the stepping stones to success.