Is There Room for Anger in Management?

Whilst running a session on boardroom dynamics recently and discussing the role of emotions in facilitating effective team work, one participant questioned whether anger is an effective emotion to exhibit.

Good question. Whilst a display of anger can no doubt be effective, to me, it depends on what you are trying to achieve in the situation and the long-term impact of that anger – on you and others.

Accepted wisdom suggests that anger, whilst being natural, is not something that serves us well.  Note that there are always exceptions, such as in situations where we are in danger, but let’s leave those aside for the moment. When anger surfaces, there is always a split micro-second when we can choose whether to react in anger or to control our anger, exercise some reason and opt for a different emotional state. In short, we can express, suppress or extinguish the anger.

If we express anger, we run the risk of hurting others or earning a reputation as a fireball, as volatile, and maybe even unhinged if we frequently express anger and our anger is disproportionate to the situation. Suppressing anger in the long-term can cause us damage – high blood pressure, high heart rate and depression. Briefly stated, not a good strategy. Extinguishing the anger by calming down, perhaps through relaxed breathing techniques or physically moving ourselves away from the situation, letting the anger die out and then deciding what would be the best course of action is generally accepted as the optimal approach for ourselves and others.

But is it? Are there situations, or even cultures, where it is imperative to display anger to communicate effectively and get things done? Let’s broadly categorize the situations we face into two types: within our control, or within the control of our team, or beyond our control. E.g. applying the wrong discount to a deal is within our control, losing a deal due to a last minute discount by the competition is, by and large, beyond our control.

So imagine a case where, after agreeing a 10% discount, a team member applies a 20% discount, rendering the deal unprofitable. You, as a manager, might feel anger. Let’s say the team member frequently makes similar revenue-impacting mistakes and you have asked repeatedly for greater care in preparing proposals. What would serve you best in this situation, given your role as the leader? Would anger in any form – controlled, but visible anger or an outburst of anger, be effective? Whilst an outburst may prove effective in the short-term, it is hardly a long-term strategy. Even if used in extra-ordinary situations, what effect would exhibiting anger have on you, what would it say about you, and what effect would it have on your colleague? Regardless of the competence of the colleague, a more professional approach would be to state clearly that this type of action is unacceptable, determine if there were mitigating circumstances and then suggest a path forward, such as, “This was not what we agreed. It shows a lack of attention to detail and/or poor listening skills. We cannot afford another error like this, so for the interim, I need to take you off proposal preparation. When you show that you have improved in those areas we can reconsider”.  Such a response is commonly described as ‘assertive’ behaviour. That would most likely not be the end of the conversation, but it would send a clear message, which wouldn’t be polluted or confused by the recipient – when anger is involved, the recipient of a message may disregard the message believing that the boss is angry and will forget about the incident when once again calm.

Having said that, is controlled anger an effective and reasonable response to the situation? The same message, but with an undercurrent of genuine displeasure may be warranted and effective. Similarly, humour can be very effective in highlighting a mistake – and helping a colleague to get back on track. It really depends on the personalities involved.

Linked to this is the question of authenticity? We connect to people we believe are genuine. If you are known as someone who loses their temper at times, and you start to control it, visibly restraining yourself, will colleagues feel you are no longer being authentic? Possibly, but as leaders grow, they try to build their strengths and overcome their weaknesses. Changing perceived negative behaviours is respected and admired. If you are known to be slightly hot-headed but want to change, you could let it be known that you are working on your temper and ask to be called out when colleagues believe you are slipping. It ultimately comes down to who and how you are and what you want to be known for – being authentically angry or making changes, whilst remaining authentic to your strengths and not your weakness.

Easier said than done. We all experience anger and we experience anger as a reaction to different triggers. To get a grip on anger, note when anger arises – the frequency, situations, ferocity of the feeling, how long it lasts and who or what it is directed against. Some people feel angry when something happens that is out of their control, or when they predicted something would happen and they didn’t do anything to prevent it. Others are more frequently angered by the actions of others, whether that be perceived incompetence of a team member, or office politics, or being passed over for recognition or promotion, or even when faced with an inattentive sales person. Perhaps you are angered by others’ treatment of you – people being dismissive or condescending towards you? Whatever the situation, if you display anger, how is that anger serving you? Does it help get a result – and possibly get the result quicker than would otherwise have been possible? Even if it does, how are you perceived by others for letting anger show – and will anger be an effective method in all such situations? Does being angry or showing anger make you feel better i.e. ‘’get it out of your system’’ or do you immediately regret it and apologize? Again, even if it does make you feel momentarily better, what is the cost of the display – to you and others?

Is anger culturally acceptable and indeed expected in some situations? There are many comedy sketches that show foreigners losing their temper in a new culture and shouting. This is usually due to not being understood or being served in the manner they expect. We laugh about that, but when faced with new cultures, how many of us are guilty of acting out those scenes – and with equally poor results? That failure essentially comes down to communication. We might want to reflect on how we can communicate better so that our counterparts or colleagues actually fully understand us. Too often we disparage others for not understanding us, but that is our fault of poor communication.  Even when communication is difficult, anger is not an effective route – it certainly doesn’t improve understanding.

Is anger a default emotion for you?  If you opt for anger frequently, consider how this is impacting you – physically and mentally, as well as those around you. Consider also the alternatives open to you and start making some changes. However, for a person to be persistently angry in the workplace suggests a larger issue – outside of major life traumas or deeper psychological issues, it suggests the person is in an unsustainable position. Perhaps the anger is due to a cultural mismatch, a role that does not fit the person’s skills (i.e. where they are underutilized or overstretched) or a reporting line misfit. If the organization recognizes this and is able to address the issues together with the individual, wonderful - but if not, the individual needs to look elsewhere for an alternative career path.

To summarize, anger is generally not a helpful emotion to display – for the ‘’sender’’ or the ‘’recipient’’. Whilst there are some occasions where a short display of anger may prove effective and be warranted if used in a controlled and pointed manner, as a general rule, when tempted to exhibit anger, stop - and taking a wider perspective, decide what serves you best in the situation.